My sister and her husband owe my mom and I money, and I do not know how to handle the situation.


Sassy Pants , Sunday, 1st of August 2010 02:08:55 AM

My sister (Michelle) and her husband (Dan) seperated in April of 2008. 
Sassy Pants
Michelle is a stay at home mom. Dan at that time was a tool and die maker. 
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Dan moved out of the house, and my sister was stuck paying the bills 
Joined: Thursday, 10th of June 2010, 21:07:27
because Dan refused to. During the four months Michelle and Dan were 
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seperated my mom paid my sisters house payments, electric, cell phone, and 
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car payments. l paid out money to take care of my sisters horse. Michelle 
and Dan both promised my mom and l when they sold 20 acres of their land 
they would pay us. That never happened. Dan received a severence pay of 
$18,000, and we were suppose to get reimbursed out of that and it never 
happened. According to my sister their house payment is $1500, and they 
are two months behind on their mortgage. My sister informed my mom and l 
that her and Dan would pay us out of income tax. Now that they are behind 
on their mortgage payments we are not going to be reimbursed from their 
income tax. l am a single mom with two young kids, plus, l am a full-time 
student. My mom and l are both on a tight income. We did not have the 
money to shell out, but my mom and l did not wanna see my sister and her 
kids go without a roof over their head and no electric in the house. We 
also did not wanna see the horse that my niece has starve. My mom and l 
are really upset because we need that money. l wanna take Michelle and Dan 
to court. My mom on the other hand says that we will never see the money, 
and if l take Michelle to court it will tear the family apart. What upsets 
me the most is it has been told by my brother that Dan has no intention on 
ever paying me or my mom back. l do not know if Dan said this or if it is 
Mark is opinion. l am totally confused and l do not know what to do. Any 
suggestions would be greatly appreciated.
 
 
 
 
 

Tickly Britches , Monday, 2nd of August 2010 09:49:27 AM

It seems like there is a lot left unspoken between you& Mum, &  
Tickly Britches
Michelle& Dan. It seems like court is a very drastic move when it seems as  
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though you haven't really had open lines of communication about the money.  
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Speak to her plainly & ask her if she intends to pay you back? Remind her  
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that the money was a loan, & that the original expectation was to be paid  
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back. If she is struggling, discuss a payment plan with her - say, could  
she pay back $50 a week? Have a good, open discussion about it. Stress to  
her that family & relationship is what is most important to you, & that  
you are trying to settle the matter in a way that preserves relationship.  
It seems that once the lines of communication are open, you will find out  
her intentions & will be able to solve it. If not, perhaps sitting down to  
a meeting with a mediator present would be helpful. Court should really be  
the last option - taking ur sister to court would most likely destroy ur  
relationships, & trust me, over the span of a lifetime, relationship is  
more important than money.  
 
 
 
 
 

French Frie , Tuesday, 3rd of August 2010 02:31:50 AM

MadCatter:  
French Frie
 
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Well, that is a little unfair to say that everyone else doesn't have their  
Joined: Thursday, 6th of May 2010, 17:41:13
priorities in order. The sister & brother-in-law have certainly not acted  
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like family in this situation--all they've done is take advantage of & lie  
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to their sister & mother. Maybe they shouldn't be taken to court, but they  
definitely shouldn't be given more money. Although the OP loves her  
sister, she can not keep continuing to give her money while she is  
struggling herself. It is not benefiting her sister, either--what is she  
learning from all this? That she can treat her family badly & profit from  
it? Sometimes the best thing you can do for someone you love is to let  
them make their own mistakes & make it right themselves.  
 
 
 
 
 

Papi , Wednesday, 4th of August 2010 05:11:52 PM

Learn form this, never len money to friends or family unless  
Papi
you are OK with never getting it back. There is a reason banks would not  
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loan them any money. What makes you think you know more about loaning  
Joined: Tuesday, 20th of April 2010, 04:46:06
money tan banks are. Actually they haven't been all that good at it  
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either.  
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Cuddie Wubbie Baby Buns , Thursday, 5th of August 2010 03:26:17 AM

Sounds like your sister will soon need to move. Hope home gets  
Cuddie Wubbie Baby Buns
sold. But Dan would be one you need to go after in court. He had the  
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money to reimburse you and your Mom and he was the responsible money  
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earner of the family moved out and dumped it all on your sister and her  
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relatives. It is only way you and your mom may one day get reimbursed by  
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a judgment on his credit. There is no guarantee in promises.  
 
 
 
 
 

lil one , Friday, 6th of August 2010 05:16:11 AM

anica2831:  
lil one
 
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I totally agree with you. Family is more important than money. The guy  
Joined: Saturday, 24th of April 2010, 18:20:09
that said take them to small claims court.whatever. We must be the  
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minority because so far we're the only two in the who feels this way.  
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Maybe we just have our priorities in order! :)  
 
ashmelee:  
 
You make a good point. Thank you for the perspective.  
 
 
 
 
 

teddyboo , Saturday, 7th of August 2010 12:51:24 PM

chances are court will not deliver the money, they can make a  
teddyboo
judgment but the odds of you receiving money are slim. Allow the kids to  
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stay in your home, but not the sister or Dan, let them loose their house.  
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If you stop helping people all the time they have to start helping  
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themselves.  
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Chances are you will never see the moeny you lent them.  
 
 
 
 
 

boo bear , Sunday, 8th of August 2010 11:43:23 AM

If you really need the money I would take them to court. If he  
boo bear
did say he has no intention on paying you back then he didn't even  
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appreciate you helping him and should be taught a lesson. Your sister may  
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understand. I would trying talking to her first to see if she can do  
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something. She might even be able to take him to court for sticking her  
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with all those bills if they had an agreement to split the bills.  
 
Good Luck. Hope everything works out.  
 
 
 
 
 

SouthSide Bestie , Monday, 9th of August 2010 09:03:18 PM

Never ever loan money to ANYONE, including relatives, without  
SouthSide Bestie
something in writing that says it is to be paid back and then signed by  
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everyone. Too late for that now though. You shouldn't take your sister  
Joined: Thursday, 6th of May 2010, 07:04:15
to court. It would ruin your relationship with her forever even though it  
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is half ruined already. I doubt you will ever see the money.  
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Babe Cakes , Tuesday, 10th of August 2010 03:25:02 AM

i would never make my sister pay me back for anything.guess  
Babe Cakes
money is more important to some people then family  
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hayhay , Wednesday, 11th of August 2010 10:26:04 PM

write it off or take them to court. but remember if you take  
hayhay
them to court you need to prove that it was not a gift.  
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cookie monster , Thursday, 12th of August 2010 10:52:32 AM

Um, I am sorry to say but it sounds like your sister is also  
cookie monster
very intent on never paying you back. Its not just her man.. she used you  
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too. She has a horse, and doesn't work? Take her to court. She already has  
Joined: Tuesday, 11th of May 2010, 13:31:46
little respect for you as it is imo by misleading you like this. Im sorry  
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but thats how I see it. (And why hasnt she sold the horse?!?)  
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egyptiana , Friday, 13th of August 2010 06:58:45 AM

You can take them to small claims court to have it settled if  
egyptiana
you have any proof.  
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juicy lips , Saturday, 14th of August 2010 01:39:39 AM

talk to them if that doesnt work try court  
juicy lips
 
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